Wedding Proposals By Joe Millionaire, The Bachelorette, & Walther

By: Rev. Jack Cascione

Joe Millionaire and the love of his life have already broken up after the young lady he picked out of 25, discovered that Joe just can't stop living the "bachelor" life.  It would be cruel to deprive all those other women?

The whole nation has discovered that the Bachloret has slept with at least one man before she cut the field down to the final two out, of 25 future husbands.  She then slept with each of the final two candidates to learn which one she really loved.

Most American's today, wouldn't think of marrying someone they had not slept with.  The culture of experimentation and adultery/fornication is now accepted American practice.  You never know which "partner" you will fall in love with.

There is one thing Americans understand about love and marriage: You can't trust anyone too much because nothing lasts forever.


 The following letter is by C. F. W. Walther to the woman he wanted to marry, but whom he never dated.  He was 30 years old when he wrote this letter. This is the love letter written by the future President of the LCMS to his future bride.




To Emilie Buenger,
Perry County, MO

   St. Louis, Aug. 10, 1841

Dear, heartily beloved Emilie,

As little as I have till now had the right to write to you, and particularly with such a greeting, yet I cannot do otherwise if I am to be honest with you.  Nearly two years have gone by, as you will perhaps recall, since through your dear brother Fritz I at least indicated from afar a precious, sublime wish of my heart which no one in the world but you can fulfill.  But how wonderful have been the ways on which our heavenly Father has led me during the past two years!  I do not need to tell you anything of this; my life has been an open book for you.  Only this much I must confess, that I often, with deep misery of soul, felt forced to believe that God's dark leadings were a sign that it was not His holy will to grant me the fulfillment of the dearest wish I have in this world.

However, also in me the promise of Psalm 103 has been fulfilled:  "He will not always chide, nor will He keep His anger forever."  God has turned His friendly countenance toward me once more, and trustfully I have therefore again laid my old wish down at the feet of my God and Savior.  I have also today poured out my heart to your dear mother.  So you alone remain, whose yes or no will reveal to me the will of my gracious God.

Therefore I cannot wait any longer to express this my wish frankly also to you.  It is this:  Will you, dearest Emilie, become my life's companion? Can you return, at least in some degree, the love which, as I now confidently hope, God has enkindled in my heart for you?  Do you believe that you can live with me happily, contentedly, and God-pleasingly in a union as intimate and inseparable unto death as the holy estate of matrimony is?

I do not believe that any explanations on my part are necessary, as if you first had to become acquainted with me.  You know me, my character, my faith, my failings and weaknesses, my outward position; you know that you will find no temporal fortune, no honor before the world, no assured future with me.  I can therefore only add my pledge that you will have in me a spouse who will love you dearly and by God's grace faithfully.  I have no one whom I could ask to speak for me to you; I have therefore prayed the dear Lord Himself to be my Eliezer and to direct your heart according to His holy will and to our mutual temporal and eternal welfare.  Follow His guidance and then inform me by return messenger of your God-directed decision.

As communication between here and Perry County is often long interrupted, you will not, as I hope for your love, think ill of me for making the following suggestion.   If you can, in God's name, say yes to my question, then we shall look upon your declaration as the completion of our betrothal, since your dear mother today and my good mother already in Germany in advance have given their parental consent thereto.  I would therefore in this event not come to Perry County before our marriage.  If this is agreeable to you, I should like to have the publication of the banns of marriage made in Frohna and here on the 13th, 14th and 15th Sundays after Trinity (5th, 12th and 19th of September) and the marriage ensue perhaps on the Monday after the last date, namely Sept. 20, in the church at Frohna. The day of my arrival and that of your dear mother would be, if you accept my suggestion, God willing, on the 15th or 16th of September.  The enclosed letter, addressed to my dear brother-in-law, contains the request to publish the banns on the suggested days and to perform the marriage ceremony; I beg you, therefore, not to deliver this letter to my dear brother-in-law before you can also announce to him that you have given me your dear yes.

I am almost surprised at myself for daring, in this first letter, to speak so freely of betrothal, of publishing the banns, of marriage, etc.; how much more will you perhaps be astonished!  May you, however, recognize this as nothing else than my wholehearted confidence in you, that you will, even if you could not give me your hand, certainly grant me the privilege of having at least vividly imagined myself out of pure grace, without my merit or worthiness, in the position of seeing you as my God-given, dearly beloved bride!

Now, may all my wishing and hoping be commended to the Lord and to the guidance of His love and grace!  May He give you a joyous decision and then make your heart firm, sure, and certain that you rest in His grace and under His holy benevolence; and if God brings us together, we will mutually serve Him day and night, without ceasing, faithfully, until death, by the power of His omnipotent grace in Christ Jesus, your and my Savior.  Amen.

Please give my hearty greetings to dear Ernst and Lyddie and tell them that I hope to see them very soon if God wills.

 Your daily intercessor with God,
 Carl Ferdinand Wilhelm Walther

If you are wondering what happened, Emilie agreed to marry C. F. W. Walther. There are additional letters about the event in "Selected Letters" of "Selected Writings" of C. F. W. Walther Published by Concordia Publishing House in St. Louis.

February 20, 2003